It’s about time that somebody came up with a proper explanation for Twitter. McSweeny’s nails it:
Twitter seems to be, first and foremost, an online haven where teenagers making drugs can telegraph secret code words to arrange gang fights and orgies. It also functions as a vehicle for teasing peers until they commit suicide.
There is also a succinct explanation for the ‘fail whale’:
Twitter is electric/computerized and available at all times, except when sexual misconduct and murder are “over capacity.” During these times, teen drug makers see a picture of a dead whale alerting them to bad energy.
UPDATE: On a similar theme, “Keith Starky Explains Twitter“.